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By Teacher Jamie Quitain-Good
1. Keep your own anxiety under tabs.
When parents send their children to school for the first time, it is perfectly normal for them to feel anxious about their first day. If you’re worried that he might cling to your leg and not let go, it is best to keep your feelings under tabs. He’ll surely pick up on your mood and feel nervous too. It tells him that you don’t trust the new faces in his classroom, and certainly, he would have a hard time trusting them too.
2. Say Goodbye.
First things first, we have to say goodbye. This may seem like the simplest step, but this is the hardest to do. Give your tot a kiss, a goodbye hug and tell him you’ll be there at the playroom when Teacher brings them out in a choo-choo train, and leave. Don’t linger. This may send your tot the message that if he cries hard enough, he is allowed not to deal with this new experience called preschool. Don’t sneak out, either. This may in turn send your tot the message that when he starts to trust the people in the classroom and allow himself to get engaged, Mommy will leave him. The next day will be harder than the first if this happens.
3. Always keep promises.
Trust is very crucial at this stage in your preschooler’s life. If you promise that you will see him the minute he enters the playroom after class, you have to be there, and not one minute late. When you tell him he has to stay and that you won’t be popping in the classroom anytime, you have to keep that too. Any promise you give your tot, most especially at this time, builds or breaks his trust, and tells how fast he can deal with separation anxiety.
4. Pack something soothing.
It is important that we show our tots how valid his feelings are and that we respect them. Belittling his feelings may force him to push them down and not deal with them. As we recognize this, it is also important that we offer solutions to soothe them. We can have him bring our photos, or small special items from home that might comfort him.
5. Try a change.
Sometimes, it helps to have another trusted adult bring your child to school. Some tots have the tendency to cling longer to Mommy or Daddy. Have your goodbye rituals at home, or even at the gate, but have another adult bring him to the classroom. This might ease his separation anxiety.
These are just a few tips to help you and your child overcome the first day blues. Bottomline, we should just show our children how much we love them and assure them that going to school is part of life’s reality, and all these will work well. Just have fun with your tots, and in no time, they’ll be asking you to bring them to school, even on weekends! Enjoy!
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